He spent the first day packing his belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases. On the second day, he had the movers come and collect his things. On the third day, he sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candle-light, put on some soft background music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a 5th of VO Gold.
When he had finished, he went into each and every room and deposited a few half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar into the hollow of the curtain rods. He then cleaned up the kitchen and left.
When the wife returned with her new boyfriend, all was bliss for the first few days.
Then slowly, the house began to smell.
They tried everything; cleaning, mopping and airing the place out. Vents were checked for dead rodents and carpets were steam cleaned. Air fresheners were hung everywhere. Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which they had to move out for a few days and in the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting.
Nothing worked. People stopped coming over to visit. Repairmen refused to work in the house. The maid quit.
Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move.
A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could not find a buyer for their stinky house. Word got out and eventually even the local realtors refused to return their calls. Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.
The ex-husband called the woman and asked how things were going. She told him the saga of the rotting house. He listened politely and said that he missed his old home terribly and would be willing to adjust his divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back.
Knowing her ex-husband had no idea how bad the smell was, she agreed on a price that was about 1/3rd of what the house had been worth, but only if he were to sign the papers that very day.
He agreed and within the hour her lawyers delivered the paperwork.
A week later the woman and her boyfriend stood smiling as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home.........
And to spite the ex-husband, they even took the curtain rods!!!!!!
....NOTHING LIKE A HAPPY ENDING.....
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Topic: for all you MEN out there,,, (Read 214 times)