The Pulse of Youth Soccer in Washington State

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Author Topic: Parents, we can do better!  (Read 1718 times)

thenoseknows

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Parents, we can do better!
« on: April 09, 2017, 08:42:35 PM »

As our children grow in this sport aggressiveness is highly encouraged. Something we may want to think about encouraging is compassion.

My DD plays U-19 and may have been delivered her last club season game on Saturday unexpectedly. She is a goalkeeper, and has injured many players (not intentionally) and when she injures those players she will make sure they are ok until help arrives or protect them until the ref blows the whistle.

On Saturday our team played a team in Spokane at Plantes Ferry, a direct kick was taken, no one was around my DD when she jumped up to catch the ball, on her way down she was knocked unconscious by a knee to the side of her face. She was out for a solid 20 seconds.

The player that delivered the blow? Immediately ran away LAUGHING, told her team what happened and they laughed as well. She had no concern for my DD that lay in the goal box knocked out, with her eyes open (and as a parent, that is horrifying to come upon)

Parents, we can do better, while we and their coaches teach aggressiveness, please remember that compassion is also a good character trait to have as a soccer player.
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lastplanet

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Re: Parents, we can do better!
« Reply #1 on: April 09, 2017, 11:29:15 PM »

Oh man, really sorry to hear about your daughter.  Those 20 seconds must have felt like an eternity.  Hopefully she recovers quickly and without too many days in a dark room. 
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thenoseknows

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Re: Parents, we can do better!
« Reply #2 on: April 10, 2017, 06:14:35 AM »

I think the scariest part was the ride from the field to the hospital. She kept asking the same series of questions over and over, after we would answer them, she started over almost immediately
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Irascible

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Re: Parents, we can do better!
« Reply #3 on: April 10, 2017, 05:10:40 PM »

A gentle(woman's) game played by thugs.  As my kids get closer & closer to the end of their youth careers, I've never been more disappointed in the decency, virtues and morality of players, coaches and parents associated with soccer (and many other sports).  I've seen things I never thought possible in kids sports.  If this is the trend in America, we're a failing state.  Certainly there is the other end of the continuum, and Ive witnessed positive incidents of proper behavior many times.  But isn't that what we're suppose to experience?
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BothellSoccerDad

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Re: Parents, we can do better!
« Reply #4 on: April 10, 2017, 09:19:15 PM »

I hear you, it is unbelievable what parents and coaches allow on the field. I still think about my DD quarter final game at the Nike Crossfire Challenge 2 years ago where one of the opposing defenders was a dirty player and the parents & coach condoned it. I am not calling her a dirty player because of the hard tackles, I am calling her a dirty player because of the hitting, kneeing, slapping, and pinching that she was doing away from the play all game long. I only saw the one defender doing it but my DD swore that all of the defenders were doing it. The game only had the Center Ref so when the ref was looking away I watched this girl do all this dirty stuff to the forwards and was stunned that the coach and parents let the girl play the entire game and no one said boo to her that I could tell. If it was my DD I would have walked across the field and removed her form the game myself if the coach did not remove her him or herself.

My DD and the other forwards had red marks on their backs, sides and legs after the game because of it. After the game the parents of that team were yelling at our parents that our girls were going to get destroyed in the semis and while I did not hear it one of our parents said that they even yelled that they hoped one of our girls would get "taken out" in the next game. I should mention that these girls were 10 & 11 at the time. Based on all of that the only conclusion that I could come up with is that the coach and parents condoned that behavior if not outright coached and encouraged it.

Because of that game I swore I would never let either of my kids play for the ISC gunners ever and I tell other parents who are looking for a "premier" club in the area about that game and the behavior they either condoned or encouraged.  I will never let my kids play in that kind of environment.
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ForTheKids

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Re: Parents, we can do better!
« Reply #5 on: April 10, 2017, 09:31:46 PM »

Recent trip out of state south. One of the opposing team's dads ... along with his little laughing group of minions .. spent the entire game berating and digging one of our players ... I mean like 10-15 feet from the player whenever she was near.  She started giving it back to him as well.  After the game, his wife followed the player to the parking lot continuing the talking smack.   This was not kiddie soccer, it was U18/U19 so the girls could take it and I was more concerned the smack-talking mom would have to get peeled off the pavement before the team manager intervened.

To shame the club, I'll call them out.  The Mustangs.  Affluent, median income for Danville, CA is $148,000.  Usually ECNL matches are pretty low key but these parents were trash.  Its pretty pathetic a community that has 3 times the national household income average has no class and views young women are fair game for this sort of crap.

As Irascible said, if this is the nature of America now, we are a failing state.
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thenoseknows

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Re: Parents, we can do better!
« Reply #6 on: April 11, 2017, 07:50:59 AM »

I told my daughter, had she ever acted like that in her youth career I would have immediately yanked her from the game if the coach hadn't and told her she wouldn't see the field again until she could learn to act like a decent human being. I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels this horrible behavior shouldn't be condoned. Imagine the injured player who has to hear the laughing that is taking place while also wondering if their soccer career is over.
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Anfield Boy

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Re: Parents, we can do better!
« Reply #7 on: April 11, 2017, 09:34:52 AM »

So terrifying noseknows and I hope she's making progress...and as for myself, an old yet still playing gk, I can relate. I wouldn't be surprised if all kids in goal were made to wear those rugby helmets ala Petr Cech in the near future.

I can't help think about how the NFL has contributed to this unsporting culture. Where smack talk, injuries, and over the top celebrations of every tackle as if it were the winning goal in the World Cup final, are commonplace. Not only is this displayed in most household living rooms most Sundays, it's celebrated and cheered and idolized. I never thought the sport I loved playing as a kid would end up being part WWE and part soap opera with a dash of sport. Discuss!
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SillyWho

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Re: Parents, we can do better!
« Reply #8 on: April 11, 2017, 01:52:42 PM »

Dont forget NBA when talking over the top celebrating and trash talking. Every game that I coach, I go to the referees at half time and ask if any of my players need to be talked to. Whether it's mouth, overtly aggressive play, etc., I always ask, incase the officials are seeing or hearing something different than I am from the sidelines.
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ThiKuBC

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Re: Parents, we can do better!
« Reply #9 on: April 16, 2017, 07:17:38 AM »

A gentle(woman's) game played by thugs.  As my kids get closer & closer to the end of their youth careers, I've never been more disappointed in the decency, virtues and morality of players, coaches and parents associated with soccer (and many other sports).  I've seen things I never thought possible in kids sports.  If this is the trend in America, we're a failing state.  Certainly there is the other end of the continuum, and Ive witnessed positive incidents of proper behavior many times.  But isn't that what we're suppose to experience?

Uh look who won the electoral college. Proven track record of caring about no one but himself. Look no further.
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kinznk

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Re: Parents, we can do better!
« Reply #10 on: April 16, 2017, 08:11:32 AM »

Uh look who won the electoral college. Proven track record of caring about no one but himself. Look no further.

Uh look who lost the electoral college. Proven track record of caring about no one but herself. Look no further.
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